That video i just posted is a video from the movie Once, starring Glen Hansard from The Frames. It's a musical, and if the other songs are as good as those, i need to see that movie. It's bound to play at a theater in Portland, right?
Anyway, i'm sorry i haven't really told you guys anything that's ben going on in my life in the past few days. The problem is: Nothing at all has been going on in my life in the past few days. Nothing at all. I wish there was at least something happening, but, there ain't.
Alright, whatever, bye.
1) "Some people say "tomato," other people say, "pizza fruit."
- I Hate My 30's
2) Currently listening to: Nwely acquired Arcade Fire albums
3) currently falling in love with: That song, person.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Monday, July 30, 2007
JD Episode 3: When's An Actual Post Coming?
1) "He just jack peed on it, son!"
- Rob and Big
2) Currently listening to: We Are Pilots - Shiny Toy Guns
- Rob and Big
2) Currently listening to: We Are Pilots - Shiny Toy Guns
Saturday, July 28, 2007
My Foray Into Writing
Edward Halkum awoke at exactly 6:30 from his 12-hour sleep session. He was sleeping an extra hour than the other night because staff evaluations were going to be done today. He wanted to be more focused than he had ever been his whole life.
He fired up the coffee pot, slipped some bread into the toaster, and cracked two raw eggs into the blender, along with his orange juice and milk. His co-workers all considered him strange, but he didn't care. He was always told by his hero, his father, that, "Dedication to your job is dedication to a bright and better future."
After he finished his meal, he jumped into his car and drove to work, commenting on all the "bad driving" on the way. He always thought he was the best driver in this town, and everyone else had no clue what they were doing.
He arrived at work, with the always inviting, "Good morning, dork." from Kurt, the man who sits across from him. Ed didn't respond. He didn't want to stoop to Kurt's level.
He looked over to his boss, Molly's window, she wasn't in.
"Where in the hell is Molly?" asjed Ed.
"She's out sick," replied Kurt and Kim, the receptionist.
"OK, why?"
"Apparently the flu," Kurt responded.
"Um, yeah. I've never seen her take a sick day or a personal day, and she's worked here for about..." Edward quickly thought up a figure, "7 years."
"Well, then it's about time she ran, isn't it?" quipped, Kurt.
"OK, i don't think that's funny. It could be a very serious illness she has."
"You're just worried because you want your girlfriend to give you a good evaluation, aren't you?"
"Ok, that is also not funny."
"Whatever."
So, Edward went about his day, sorting files, calling clients, the usual. The end of the day arrived, that's when calls slow down. At 4:57, Edward's phone rang, as everyone else had left.
Edward answered.
"Hello?"
"Hi, is this Edward Halkum?"
"Yes this is, may i ask who this is?"
"I can't tell you who this is. But i can only tell you that you're boss has been kidnapped by very bad people and all of the people you work with are behind it. If you stay on this line with me, Ill tell you all you need to know to get her back."
Edward rapidly grabbed his pen and paper pad and wrote all of the information down. He went home that night, and went to bed even earlier. The next day was going to be a very busy one indeed.
He fired up the coffee pot, slipped some bread into the toaster, and cracked two raw eggs into the blender, along with his orange juice and milk. His co-workers all considered him strange, but he didn't care. He was always told by his hero, his father, that, "Dedication to your job is dedication to a bright and better future."
After he finished his meal, he jumped into his car and drove to work, commenting on all the "bad driving" on the way. He always thought he was the best driver in this town, and everyone else had no clue what they were doing.
He arrived at work, with the always inviting, "Good morning, dork." from Kurt, the man who sits across from him. Ed didn't respond. He didn't want to stoop to Kurt's level.
He looked over to his boss, Molly's window, she wasn't in.
"Where in the hell is Molly?" asjed Ed.
"She's out sick," replied Kurt and Kim, the receptionist.
"OK, why?"
"Apparently the flu," Kurt responded.
"Um, yeah. I've never seen her take a sick day or a personal day, and she's worked here for about..." Edward quickly thought up a figure, "7 years."
"Well, then it's about time she ran, isn't it?" quipped, Kurt.
"OK, i don't think that's funny. It could be a very serious illness she has."
"You're just worried because you want your girlfriend to give you a good evaluation, aren't you?"
"Ok, that is also not funny."
"Whatever."
So, Edward went about his day, sorting files, calling clients, the usual. The end of the day arrived, that's when calls slow down. At 4:57, Edward's phone rang, as everyone else had left.
Edward answered.
"Hello?"
"Hi, is this Edward Halkum?"
"Yes this is, may i ask who this is?"
"I can't tell you who this is. But i can only tell you that you're boss has been kidnapped by very bad people and all of the people you work with are behind it. If you stay on this line with me, Ill tell you all you need to know to get her back."
Edward rapidly grabbed his pen and paper pad and wrote all of the information down. He went home that night, and went to bed even earlier. The next day was going to be a very busy one indeed.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
I Am The World
No, this isn't some post in which i enclose some bad, cliche poem about how good i feel, this is about the things that i've discovered i love.
Baby Cakes: A nice little flash cartoon from superdeluxe.com about a man-child who lives at home, plays a role-playing game with his friends, and keeps a diary of it all for us.
Sarah Silverman: Literally, my new comedy girlfriend. I saw her movie on Comedy Central last Saturday and it solidified my love for her. There is literally nothing funnier than ironic racism.
Flight of the Conchords: A folk-parody duo from New Zealand, who now have their own HBO show. It is/they are outstanding. I've shown their videos on here before, but let me show more.
Yambo/Craig Kilborn videos: Craig Kilorn yet to play a game called Yambo, in which he'd have a male and a female guest stand side by side. He would walk around them, and when the music stops, the person he's standing next to would have to answeer the question in three seconds. Get 3 right, you win, get 3 wrong, you lose. These are a couple of my favorites.
I think that might be it for now.
I'll see you guys later
Baby Cakes: A nice little flash cartoon from superdeluxe.com about a man-child who lives at home, plays a role-playing game with his friends, and keeps a diary of it all for us.
Sarah Silverman: Literally, my new comedy girlfriend. I saw her movie on Comedy Central last Saturday and it solidified my love for her. There is literally nothing funnier than ironic racism.
Flight of the Conchords: A folk-parody duo from New Zealand, who now have their own HBO show. It is/they are outstanding. I've shown their videos on here before, but let me show more.
Yambo/Craig Kilborn videos: Craig Kilorn yet to play a game called Yambo, in which he'd have a male and a female guest stand side by side. He would walk around them, and when the music stops, the person he's standing next to would have to answeer the question in three seconds. Get 3 right, you win, get 3 wrong, you lose. These are a couple of my favorites.
I think that might be it for now.
I'll see you guys later
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
What Constitues...
In my previous post, I mentioned "a big tub of happy."
A new column, was born. I will now show you what i see in my head when i thnk of a big tub of happy.
I picture a big blue sky, with cloud in the middle of it, with a rainbow in the background.
Two of the angels from We Love Katamari are on either side of the cloud, floating.
In the very center of the cloud, sits a big, blue, plastic tub. One of those with the rope handles. It's full of pillows and unicorn drawings.
Happy music plays while i sit on this happy tub cloud.
1)What's you favorite kind of ice cream?"
"I'd say Chocolate Cherry Garcia, even though, it think technically it's a frozen yogurt...Okay?"
- Little Miss Sunshine
3) currently wondering: Why "Tears on My Pillow" is suck in my head
A new column, was born. I will now show you what i see in my head when i thnk of a big tub of happy.
I picture a big blue sky, with cloud in the middle of it, with a rainbow in the background.
Two of the angels from We Love Katamari are on either side of the cloud, floating.
In the very center of the cloud, sits a big, blue, plastic tub. One of those with the rope handles. It's full of pillows and unicorn drawings.
Happy music plays while i sit on this happy tub cloud.
1)What's you favorite kind of ice cream?"
"I'd say Chocolate Cherry Garcia, even though, it think technically it's a frozen yogurt...Okay?"
- Little Miss Sunshine
3) currently wondering: Why "Tears on My Pillow" is suck in my head
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Adapt, React, Re-Adapt, Act
[Office reference/]
Someone who in the past two weeks has said they didn't feel the same way about me, has changed their mind. Just thinking about it makes my heart fly away. And into a big tub of happy.
I'm going to try and convince her into moving here after she graduates.
I hope it works.
Someone who in the past two weeks has said they didn't feel the same way about me, has changed their mind. Just thinking about it makes my heart fly away. And into a big tub of happy.
I'm going to try and convince her into moving here after she graduates.
I hope it works.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Taste the Happy
I'm unbelievably elated right now. But pissed off about something at the same time.
I'm pissed off at the fact that i bought a used copy of Little Miss Sunshine from Wherehouse yesterday, i watched it last night, and at a certain part of the film, a weird subtitle appears and never leaves. I don't think it's in any particular language, it sorta looks like a mix between Arabic and Spanish. I turned the disc over to the fullscreen side, which i did not desire to do, and it worked very well until near the end of the movie. Another came up.
I have no idea if it is some deal with dirtiness or scratching, i looked at the disc and it seemed fine. I'll clean it later to find out.
Why the happy? Someone that sad they didn't feel the same way as i did for them changed her mind. Ecstatic feelings ensue.
1) "The fucking chicken again? Every night with the goddamn fucking chicken!"
- Little Miss Sunshine
I'm pissed off at the fact that i bought a used copy of Little Miss Sunshine from Wherehouse yesterday, i watched it last night, and at a certain part of the film, a weird subtitle appears and never leaves. I don't think it's in any particular language, it sorta looks like a mix between Arabic and Spanish. I turned the disc over to the fullscreen side, which i did not desire to do, and it worked very well until near the end of the movie. Another came up.
I have no idea if it is some deal with dirtiness or scratching, i looked at the disc and it seemed fine. I'll clean it later to find out.
Why the happy? Someone that sad they didn't feel the same way as i did for them changed her mind. Ecstatic feelings ensue.
1) "The fucking chicken again? Every night with the goddamn fucking chicken!"
- Little Miss Sunshine
Sunday, July 22, 2007
2nd Time Round
I saw Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix again yesterday. And yes, i know i spelled pheonix wrong, it's because Dan le Sac vs. Scroobius Pip told me to.
Anyway, HPatOotP the second time? it was okay. The first time for me was better. I mean, don't get me wrong, it was really great to have no cheering in the background and laughing at parts that aren't funny at all. Examples:
"Don't break ranks if one of us is killed."
"He's back." Actually people laughed at this one too. Did you see his face when he said it? It wasn't supposed to be funny.
But maybe that's why i didn't realy enjoy it the 2nd tine. Maybe ut was the children cheering for Sirius or Harry when he totally pwns Umbridge or going all, "Ohhh!" when she slaps Harry.
We'll never know.
Anyway, HPatOotP the second time? it was okay. The first time for me was better. I mean, don't get me wrong, it was really great to have no cheering in the background and laughing at parts that aren't funny at all. Examples:
"Don't break ranks if one of us is killed."
"He's back." Actually people laughed at this one too. Did you see his face when he said it? It wasn't supposed to be funny.
But maybe that's why i didn't realy enjoy it the 2nd tine. Maybe ut was the children cheering for Sirius or Harry when he totally pwns Umbridge or going all, "Ohhh!" when she slaps Harry.
We'll never know.
Friday, July 20, 2007
Like, ZOMG! LOL! LMAO! ROTFLZ! Videeowz!
Word.
Flight of the Conchords - If You're Into It:
Motion City Soundtrack - LGFUAD:
Feist - 1 2 3 4:
Family Guy - luckdragon:
Family Guy - Jaws 5:
Flight of the Conchords - If You're Into It:
Motion City Soundtrack - LGFUAD:
Feist - 1 2 3 4:
Family Guy - luckdragon:
Family Guy - Jaws 5:
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
This is Awesome
Please, please, read.
July 17, 2007 -- IT was fight night at an L.A. comedy club last week when Jon Lovitz roughed up Andy Dick over the murder of their "Saturday Night Live" colleague, Phil Hartman.
Laugh Factory owner Jamie Masada, who witnessed the assault, said, "Jon picked Andy up by the head and smashed him into the bar four or five times, and blood started pouring out of his nose." Lovitz told Page Six, "All the comedians are glad I did it because this guy is a [bleep]hole."
Lovitz and Dick have been at loggerheads since a 1997 Christmas party at Hartman's house, five months before his troubled wife Brynn flipped out, fatally shooting Hartman, then killing herself. "Andy was doing cocaine, and he gave Brynn some after she had been sober for 10 years. Phil was furious about it - and then five months later he's dead," said Lovitz, adding that when he filled in on Hartman's "Newsradio" sitcom, "I told Andy, 'I wouldn't be here now if you hadn't given Brynn that cocaine.' "
Last year, Lovitz related, a drunken Dick strolled up to his table at Ago in West Hollywood, rudely downed his guests' peach liqueur drinks, and "looked at me and said, 'I put the "Phil Hartman hex" on you - you're the next one to die.' I said, 'What did you say?' and he repeated it. I wanted to punch his face in, but I don't hit women."
When the two ran into each other at the Laugh Factory last Wednesday, "I wanted him to say he was sorry for the 'Phil Hartman hex,' " Lovitz told us. "First he says, 'I don't remember saying that.' Then he leans in and says, 'You know why I said it? Because you said I killed Phil Hartman.' Which I never said. Then he asked me to be in his new movie.
"I grabbed him by the shirt and leaned him over and said, 'I don't want to be in your movie! I don't want to be in your life!' I pushed him against the rail. Then I pushed him again really hard. A security guard broke it up. I'm not proud of it . . . but he's a disgusting human being." Dick's rep said he had no comment.
Dick's weirdness has been well documented. Last year, he licked the faces of Farrah Fawcett, Carrie Fisher and Patton Oswalt, then groped and bit the hand of Post reporter Mandy Stadtmiller at a comedy-festival taping.
yay
July 17, 2007 -- IT was fight night at an L.A. comedy club last week when Jon Lovitz roughed up Andy Dick over the murder of their "Saturday Night Live" colleague, Phil Hartman.
Laugh Factory owner Jamie Masada, who witnessed the assault, said, "Jon picked Andy up by the head and smashed him into the bar four or five times, and blood started pouring out of his nose." Lovitz told Page Six, "All the comedians are glad I did it because this guy is a [bleep]hole."
Lovitz and Dick have been at loggerheads since a 1997 Christmas party at Hartman's house, five months before his troubled wife Brynn flipped out, fatally shooting Hartman, then killing herself. "Andy was doing cocaine, and he gave Brynn some after she had been sober for 10 years. Phil was furious about it - and then five months later he's dead," said Lovitz, adding that when he filled in on Hartman's "Newsradio" sitcom, "I told Andy, 'I wouldn't be here now if you hadn't given Brynn that cocaine.' "
Last year, Lovitz related, a drunken Dick strolled up to his table at Ago in West Hollywood, rudely downed his guests' peach liqueur drinks, and "looked at me and said, 'I put the "Phil Hartman hex" on you - you're the next one to die.' I said, 'What did you say?' and he repeated it. I wanted to punch his face in, but I don't hit women."
When the two ran into each other at the Laugh Factory last Wednesday, "I wanted him to say he was sorry for the 'Phil Hartman hex,' " Lovitz told us. "First he says, 'I don't remember saying that.' Then he leans in and says, 'You know why I said it? Because you said I killed Phil Hartman.' Which I never said. Then he asked me to be in his new movie.
"I grabbed him by the shirt and leaned him over and said, 'I don't want to be in your movie! I don't want to be in your life!' I pushed him against the rail. Then I pushed him again really hard. A security guard broke it up. I'm not proud of it . . . but he's a disgusting human being." Dick's rep said he had no comment.
Dick's weirdness has been well documented. Last year, he licked the faces of Farrah Fawcett, Carrie Fisher and Patton Oswalt, then groped and bit the hand of Post reporter Mandy Stadtmiller at a comedy-festival taping.
yay
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Bevy 2.0
I bought my spindle today. A 50-pack for 6 bucks. Office Depot is awesome.
So, i have tons of burning to dom as stated in the previous post. I should get on some of it right now. I think i will.
1) "Do you understand why i do that joke? To make white people uncomfortable."
- Daniel Tosh
So, i have tons of burning to dom as stated in the previous post. I should get on some of it right now. I think i will.
1) "Do you understand why i do that joke? To make white people uncomfortable."
- Daniel Tosh
Monday, July 16, 2007
Tending to the Herd
I think i know what i'm doing with my money. Part of the original 20 dollars will be used for me to buy a spindle of CD+Rs. The rest will go towards buying DVDs, i'll probably save up for September, because a ton of things come out then. The Office, 30 Rock, Robot Chicken, etc.
Why a spindle of CD+Rs? Because the computer is massively messed up with whole albums, that need to be extracted toot-suite. Decemberists, Scissor Sisters, BJM, Dandy Warhols, The Shins, Kaiser Chiefs, Meg and Dia, and many others.
I think that's all i have to say.
1) "I went to buy Oreos at 2:00 AM last nigh. The cashier at the store always has to make some cute little comment. They have that name tag that says Shannon on it or something. She's always gotta make some comment like, "somebody's hungry!" Why don't you shut your whore mouth Shannon?"
- Last Comic Standing
Why a spindle of CD+Rs? Because the computer is massively messed up with whole albums, that need to be extracted toot-suite. Decemberists, Scissor Sisters, BJM, Dandy Warhols, The Shins, Kaiser Chiefs, Meg and Dia, and many others.
I think that's all i have to say.
1) "I went to buy Oreos at 2:00 AM last nigh. The cashier at the store always has to make some cute little comment. They have that name tag that says Shannon on it or something. She's always gotta make some comment like, "somebody's hungry!" Why don't you shut your whore mouth Shannon?"
- Last Comic Standing
Sunday, July 15, 2007
The Bevy
Upon our visit to the burg of roses, we met Drew's girlfriend, and she has pretty much exactly the same taste in music as we do.
On our last day there, she brought her CD case over, and Liz and i went through and picked out the CDs we wanted copied. We got so much, i'm calling this recent haul, "The Bevy."
Here are the CD's we acquired.
In closing, i like Borat. Did you read the back of the DVD for the rating label that said "graphic nudity?" That should have somehow implied what you were getting into. But, what can you do? I guess some people can get offended by stuff more than i can.
On our last day there, she brought her CD case over, and Liz and i went through and picked out the CDs we wanted copied. We got so much, i'm calling this recent haul, "The Bevy."
Here are the CD's we acquired.
- We Don't Need to Whisper - Angels and Airwaves
- Cities - Amberlin
- Funeral - Arcade Fire
- Neon Bible - Arcade Fire
- Midnite Vultures - Beck
- Cassadaga - Bright Eyes
- Be Not Nobody - Vanessa Carlton
- Zoot Suit Riot - Cherry Poppin' Daddies
- Discovery - Daft Punk
- Frances the Mute - Mars Volta
- The Lonesome, Crowded West - Modest Mouse
- The Moon and Antarctica - Modest Mouse
- Greatest Hits - Nirvana
- Give Up - The Postal Service
- Singles - The Smiths
- De Stijl - White Stripes
- Icky Thump - White Stripes
- Yankee Hotel Foxtrot - Wlco
- A Ghost is Born - Wilco
- Sky Blue Sky - Wilco
- Make Up the Breakdown - Hot Hot Heat
In closing, i like Borat. Did you read the back of the DVD for the rating label that said "graphic nudity?" That should have somehow implied what you were getting into. But, what can you do? I guess some people can get offended by stuff more than i can.
Saturday, July 7, 2007
Farewell Again.
Baaahahaha. Not really. I'm so mean.
Actually, we're going to Roseburg tomorrow, until next Sunday, so...yeah.
I might post, depending if i get on the internet there or not.
Okay, byesies.
1) "It's nice to meet you."
"We've met before. Quite a few times if i remember correctly."
"I meant that it was nice to meet you the time that i met you."
- Jenny (Flight of the Conchords)
Actually, we're going to Roseburg tomorrow, until next Sunday, so...yeah.
I might post, depending if i get on the internet there or not.
Okay, byesies.
1) "It's nice to meet you."
"We've met before. Quite a few times if i remember correctly."
"I meant that it was nice to meet you the time that i met you."
- Jenny (Flight of the Conchords)
Friday, July 6, 2007
First Time in a Long Time, In a Short Time
Liz and I are leaving for Roseburg on Sunday. It'll be the first time i've seen my family there since October 2005. Holy crap.
While I'm there, i have some goals:
Actually, in regards to number 3: I'll not think about certain people, i'll just talk about them and how awesome they are to other people. I hope that doesn't make me all sad in the face.
I might post while i'm there, i have no idea.
If not, I'll probably talk to you tomorrow, after the whole thing.
1) "Do you remember what you said to me?"
"Not word for word, actually, Jenny. But i do remember there were some verbs."
- Jenny (Flight of the Conchords)
While I'm there, i have some goals:
- Not get into a discussion of politics with my cousin Drew
- If they have internet, not go to /orate after the 9th, because i wanna be surprised with what song the Decemberists are playing on the Tonight Show
- Try not to be a total downer, AKA, think about certain people
Actually, in regards to number 3: I'll not think about certain people, i'll just talk about them and how awesome they are to other people. I hope that doesn't make me all sad in the face.
I might post while i'm there, i have no idea.
If not, I'll probably talk to you tomorrow, after the whole thing.
1) "Do you remember what you said to me?"
"Not word for word, actually, Jenny. But i do remember there were some verbs."
- Jenny (Flight of the Conchords)
Thursday, July 5, 2007
I Wonder, Why The Change?
My dear cousin Drew. He used to be up on the facts politically, but something's gone...well, wrong.
The family mentioned it while in a discussion about Scooter Libby. I mean, i knew it had happened and how he's totally different.
I went to his Myspace recently and read his blog, and it's the most odd thing i've read in a while.
Now, i don't agree with everything George Bush does, but come on. If you use some logic, and i mean actual logic, not the "information" you've been fed by a teacher, or some other person who should be gracing you with the value of education. I hate any person that forces their opinion on you. My Algebra teacher kept saying how gay people aren't right, and "God didn't make that." Um, if there is a god, yeah, he kinda did make that.
I mean, he's not the best president ever, but he's certainly not the worst. As i may have said before, people that do say he's the worst president ever need to brush up on their history. And actually do some research on what he's done. go here and getback to me.
The family mentioned it while in a discussion about Scooter Libby. I mean, i knew it had happened and how he's totally different.
I went to his Myspace recently and read his blog, and it's the most odd thing i've read in a while.
Now, i don't agree with everything George Bush does, but come on. If you use some logic, and i mean actual logic, not the "information" you've been fed by a teacher, or some other person who should be gracing you with the value of education. I hate any person that forces their opinion on you. My Algebra teacher kept saying how gay people aren't right, and "God didn't make that." Um, if there is a god, yeah, he kinda did make that.
I mean, he's not the best president ever, but he's certainly not the worst. As i may have said before, people that do say he's the worst president ever need to brush up on their history. And actually do some research on what he's done. go here and getback to me.
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
The 3rd
I have absolutely no plans for tomorrow, besides the parade.
I have a plan for Saturday though. I'm going to have MyPodcast Recorder open all day during the 7th of July barbecue. I'll tell everybody that they can just go up, press Record, say their words, then press stop. I hope it'll have some turnout, but the computer might be off during the time. Oh well though.
1) "I'd love a cup of tea."
"I didn't ask."
- Dance Tonight (Paul McCartney video)
I have a plan for Saturday though. I'm going to have MyPodcast Recorder open all day during the 7th of July barbecue. I'll tell everybody that they can just go up, press Record, say their words, then press stop. I hope it'll have some turnout, but the computer might be off during the time. Oh well though.
1) "I'd love a cup of tea."
"I didn't ask."
- Dance Tonight (Paul McCartney video)
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